A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Slut skills are useful in every country.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Randomize
