Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I think I won the penis lottery.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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