***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
