And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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