Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
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