you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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