This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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