So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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