THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
