I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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