the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
