Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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