in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
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