I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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