I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
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He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
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Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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