When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
