Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Randomize
