is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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