Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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