talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
