Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
