hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
