Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
