Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
