Dual....:-)
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
