Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Randomize
