She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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