I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize