Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
lets start a swedish sibling band together
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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