I didn't shave. On purpose
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Randomize
