ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
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