That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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