Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
