You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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