What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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