You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
