Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
