..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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