i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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