There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
