I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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