There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize