do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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