i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Where is the hickey?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
