We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
