Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
the night ended with taco bell and tears
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
