I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
