i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
