dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
