Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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