i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Randomize
