Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
We are two peas in an std pod
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
