You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
